The Gothamist reports that New York subway riders got a surprise when a dead shark was found riding a train Wednesday morning. Of course, riders took the opportunity to photograph the shark with Red Bull and a cigarette in its mouth in a photo that can be viewed by clicking here.
Don’t worry, the shark had a Metrocard, so it obviously paid its fare. So the only thing you have to worry about is why a dead shark was on a subway.
3 Worse Things A Shark Could Be Doing In New York Than Smoking On A Subway
1. Smoking at a beach! That may seem like a far more natural place to smoke for a shark, but smoking on beaches is illegal in NYC! And if you’re scared of sharks on beaches, you’ll definitely be afraid of non law-abiding sharks. Especially when you know Sharknado 2 is reportedly set to take place in NYC, and if a shark won’t obey the law, you can bet your bottom dollar a Sharknado cares less about your right to breath clean air.
2. Drinking 32 Ounces of Sugary Cola at one sitting. It may be legal, but it’s probably not good for your shark teeth.
3. Threatening restaurant owners they will be “swimming with the sharks” if they don’t pay protection money. Would sound more plausible and menacing coming from a shark, wouldn’t it?