Free denounced Canadian citizenship documents from Canadian-born Ted Cruz with every U.S. dollar* donated online to the Cruz campaign. Enter the secret access code to Chris Christie’s donation site, and receive a free pass to secret tunnel between New York… Read More ›
Month: November 2015
3 More Cyber Monday Republican Sales We Want To See Tomorrow
Buy anything on the internet, and Donald Trump receives 12% off support in latest polls.* Donate to Ben Carson campaign online and receive actual grain found in Egyptian pyramids.** Buy any HP product online using an HP product, and receive… Read More ›
3 Cyber Monday Republican Candidate Sales We Hope To See
It’s just a few days until Cyber Monday! Here are some deals we’d like to see: Free roast for anyone who follows Donald Trump on Twitter.* Make a donation to Ben Carson, and he’ll make one of his crazy ideas… Read More ›
3 Last Minute Republican Black Friday Sales
10% off next book written by Ted Cruz for every donation made to his campaign by midnight.* Free carbon emissions in exchange for putting any Republican candidate’s bumper sticker on the back of your SUV or pick-up.** Buy one get… Read More ›
3 Black Friday Republican Candidate Sales We’d Like To See
Buy one candidate via a Super PAC, get one free.* 50% off Chris Christie. (via a post-Thanksgiving meal weight loss plan). Free Night At Any Trump Casino If You Wear “Make America Great Again” Cap in busy streets.** *free candidate… Read More ›
We Have 3 Dumber Shopping Names Than “Super Saturday” and “Cyber Monday”
Yahoo Finance reports that according to Foursquare data, “Super Saturday,” the first day after Black Friday is actually the U.S. biggest shopping day of the year. So to make it clear, Super Saturday is better than Black Friday and Cyber… Read More ›
Yahoo Finance Useless Headline Of The Year
Here is a headline from Yahoo Finance today: “Yahoo Finance Exclusive: What keeps Warren Buffett up at night.” Ooooh what could it be? He’s one of the smartest, most successful people in the world. Whatever it is, we bet it’s… Read More ›
Car Full Of Clowns Rescues Women
The Toronto Sun reports that a man dressed as a clown rescued two women from being harassed by a man in the streets dressed in a shirt, shorts, and no shoes. The clown threw the women into his car, which… Read More ›
Pregnant Woman Completes College Test While In Labor
CNN reports that a pregnant Georgia woman completed a college psychology exam online while in labor at the hospital. The baby was born soonafter a-okay! 3 Observations That Arise From This Story You know that time you wrote a college… Read More ›
Bride Destroys Wedding Dress After Wedding Called Off Via Text
CNN reports that a bride, who was engaged for two years, received a text message calling the wedding off. So her and her bridesmaids attended a color fun fest and ruined her dress and the bridesmaids’ dresses by wearing them… Read More ›
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