Can’t Find The Mayonnaise In The Fridge? Maybe It’s Because The Fridge Is Floating In A River!

CNN reports that all kinds of crazy items are being dumped and removed from America’s rivers and waterways. Items that one individual has removed over the past 15 years include:

“67,000 tires… 218 washing machines, 19 tractors, 12 hot tubs, four pianos and almost 1,000 refrigerators.”

Which is all just a reminder that trying to wash your clothes in a dirty, washing-machine filled-river, by dumping the washing machine into the river, is a bad idea for more reasons than potential electrocution. But kudos to the man cleaning America’s waterways by removing these things! Your friends probably hate helping you on moving day move a hide-a-bed down a stairway, never mind removing a piano from a flowing river!

3 Worse Things To Dump In A River

1. Dump-trucks and garbage trucks full of tires. That is really taking the entire illegal dumping thing to a whole new level of laziness, don’t you think?

2. Goldfish. Who would think freeing fish into rivers would create a risk of the fish sustaining tractor injuries? Not fish. Contrary to myths, fish have longer than a three-second memory. They can reportedly remember things for five months! That’s an entire harvesting season they watched out a window of your farm house, never expecting someone would drive a tractor into the water!

3. Guns. If someone finds a gun in a river, in addition to potentially being there for suspicious reasons, how do you do a background check if the finder wants to keep the gun? We’d hate to see a “I-found-it-in-a-river” gun-show-like loophole!

Categories: Humor, The Environment

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

1 reply

  1. Great comment. I would parlobby add that its also a little biased to suggest that a return to a more primative way of life is going to kill lots of people, really? Just exactly how many people in our modern safe civilisation die as a result of pollutants in our waterways, toxicity in our food, carcinogens in the air we breathe or the millions globally killed by car accidents, drug overdoses, carpet bombing and ahost of other weird and wonderful ways we have invented to wipe ourselves off the earth one way or the other a heap of people will die at least with a return to nature we can guareentee providing a cleaner better safer world to ensuing generations then the one we are catapulting towards at the moment


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