1. Ted Cruz is like Milwaukee’s beer, Miller. He’s the Champagne of beers, or in other words, the best of the worst leading Republican candidates.
2. Donald Trump is like Milwaukee’s motor cycle manufacturer, Harley-Davidson… a noisy HOG of television time.
3. Bernie Sanders is like Milwaukee’s other beer, Pabst Blue Ribbon… popular amongst hipsters, especially in Brooklyn!

Categories: Mildly Bad News

Tags: Humor, literature, Parody, Politics, satire, similes, Writing