CNN reports that a study indicates that mice forced to simulate sleeping the same hours as human shift-workers suffered brain damage. So we’re posting this at 4:00 a.m. Eastern Standard Time to at least entertain our mice readers (before brain damage kicks in and prevents them from reading this site regularly.)

3 Questions That Arise From This Story

1. If this was a true scientific test, what kind of shift work were the mice doing? These mice better not have taken valuable American jobs like wearing mouse mascot suits at theme parks and kids-birthday-party-mouse-themed-pizza restaurants.

2. Is there a type of mouse-shift work that would create American jobs? We hear mice, living between walls, chewing plastic pipes and electric wiring keep plumbers and electricians in business.

3. Is it really necessary to force mice to do shift-work for science? We’re not neurologists, but wouldn’t taking cat-scans of human shift workers get the job done? Even better, wouldn’t hiring mice to operate the cat scan equipment double efficiency? Answer: no: mice flee at the word “cat” scan.

Categories: science

Tags: biology, employment, Humor, insomnia, Parody, psychology, satire, Science, sleep