Your Phone May Be Telling Yoga Instructors You Are Too Old To Be At The Club

The Wall Street Journal reports that Turnstyle, a start-up company that offers free Wi-Fi in places like coffee shops is using WiFi and sensors to track shoppers in about 200 business in downtown Toronto.

In other words, it tracks whether the shoppers go to places like the gym, yoga studios, stadiums, nightclubs, or restaurants playing too much Frankie Goes To Hollywood. Then it shares the information (but not the customer names) with various clients.

From the article:

“… a local restaurant, hired an ’80s-music DJ for Friday nights after learning from Turnstyle that more than 60% of the restaurant’s Wi-Fi-enabled customers were over 30.”

3 Worse Places Your Phone Could Be Tracking You

1. Inside a concrete stadium that never gets LTE reception. The only thing worse than not being able to Tweet your dismay of getting dragged to a Nickelback concert is that your phone might suggest to all of your favorite restaurants that you like Nickelback. Mark “Nickelback Saturdays” on your calendar if 60% of the restaurants’ patrons also equally hate Nickelback but got dragged to their concert by their girlfriends.

2. The Privacy Convention. The good news is some restaurants will leave you alone and respect your privacy the next time you visit with your mistress. The bad news is some restaurants will misread the information shared with them, and assume you are a fan of “Piracy,” leading to service by a waiter with a parrot on his shoulder.

3. At a restaurant that plays 80s music when you are in the 40% of the restaurant goers who wish 80s music was not playing since you were born in 2011. As you are a toddler with an iPad, you get counted too, which means maybe your local restaurant may create “Multiple Toddler Temper Tantrum” Mondays!

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Categories: Humor, Technology

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

2 replies

  1. Maybe if we all start wearing aluminum foil hats, those folks will be unable to read our thoughts. Actually, I guess we need to make the hats for our smart devices.

    Like

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