The Telegraph reports that a woman in New Zealand mistakenly confused a tube of cold sore cream with super-glue, resulting in inadvertently gluing her lips shut. Which of course made her emergency telephone call seeking help tricky… fortunately they were able to get her to the hospital where doctors used paraffin oil to remove the glue.
3 Questions That Arise From This Story
1. How many cold sores does someone have that they use what they think is cold sore cream to glue their entire mouth shut? If it’s only one, we don’t want to depend on such a person’s aim to back us up with a rifle during a zombie apocalypse.
2. Speaking of zombie apocalypses, wouldn’t super-gluing the zombies’ mouths’ shut help solve the whole biting thing? Maybe this woman just discovered that super-glue tubes, not guns, may be the perfect weapon during a zombie apocalypse!
3. Who gave the zombies paraffin oil in this hypothetical situation we created? Will anyone ever make a well-reasoned decision during a zombie apocalypse movie or TV series?
Categories: Humor, World News
NotTheWorstNews 
I feel like a horrible person for laughing hysterically. You have a point with #1, an extremely valid point. I bet the doctors and nurses had a good laugh at that one. I know they must see some crap, but dang.
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You would have felt more horrible if you tried laughing after accidentally gluing your own lips shut! So don’t feel horrible knowing that!
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