If you were planning on making an old joke today about dumb athletes having gold medals bronzed, hold up! There’s hardly any gold in those gold medals, as CNBC reports that Olympic gold medals contain the following metals:
- Silver 92.5%
- Copper 6.16%
- Gold 1.34%
So congratulations to all of the gold medal winners so far, but before you mail in your valuable gold medal to “Cash For Gold” to receive whatever amount of money they decide to send you in the mail, remember, the medal does not contain as much gold as you think. And if you think mailing in a gold medal to Cash For Gold would land you on their funniest things people have ever mailed in list, look out, because according to them, people have mailed in gold teeth, platinum femur rods, and gold spray-painted Pokemon key-chains.
Still the medal does look golden, and there are a lot of other things they could have made these medals of that would be less valuable, which makes us wonder…
What Might Happen If Yum Brands Made Olympic Medals? We Have 3 Suggestions!
Yum brands owns Pizza Hut, Taco Bell, and KFC, all of which have been know to combine eclectic ingredients, often involving replacing grain ingredients with cheese or chicken.
1. The Taco Bell Rold Gold Crunch Wrap Burrito Supreme Medal. Hey, they’ve already made taco shells out of Doritos, so having a golden pretzel outer medal shell made of fellow Frito Lay Product, Rold Gold is not that far a stretch.
2. The Pizza Hut Silver Crust Extreme-To-The Edge Pizza Medal. Now that we know silver is the new gold, why not celebrate with a pizza made with edible silver paint? Not extreme enough for you? Did we mention in our vision, the pizza will be delivered by a shiny silver robot?
3. The KFC Bronze Grilled Chicken Sandwich Medal. The buns would be chicken! Surrounding more chicken! With boring old lettuce replaced by popcorn chicken! And a popcorn chicken chain necklace to wear the medal around your neck. Just don’t go near the Barnyard Dawg while wearing this, because if we’ve learned anything from cartoons, he’s a fan of chicken.
On second thought, maybe we’ll leave the menu-making to the marketing and chef experts at various companies in fast food land, where we await their next creations! Until then, hope everyone’s enjoying the Olympic games!