3 Definitions We Have For Natural “Born Citizen”

As Donald Trump continues to question whether Canadian-born Ted Cruz is a “Natural Born Citizen,” a phrase that is not defined by the Constitution, we offer 3 definitions:

  1.  It means what it meant in 1776, just like all Ted Cruz constitutional interpretations. So you must be naturally born without the help of modern doctors or medical technology. Unless you were delivered by a mid-wife, or in a horse-drawn carriage en route to an American nativity scene barn, you do not qualify.
  2. Your body is in the unchanged state of a “natural born” citizen. That means no artificial hair colors. So sorry, Mr. Trump, you currently do not qualify.
  3. You’re an Evangelical born anywhere, but currently an American Citizen. Because you were born again using the powers of the Holy Spirit, which sounds more “natural” than all of that voodoo hospital stuff. So figure it out, Ted Cruz, get baptized by one of the voters you are pandering to – and voila, you are a “Natural Born (Again) Citizen!”
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Categories: 2016 Presidential Election, Politics

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