Yahoo Finance reports that only 8% of Americans get extra free days off during the summer, including Fridays (known as “Summer Fridays!”)
Anyway, here are 3 new holidays we propose in light of the new apparent holiday decline…
- Summer “Trump” Days… this is when your Atlantic City casino gives you a holiday every day after Labor Day because it may be bankrupt or closed down. (Note: may not be paid!)
- Summer “Everyone Else Running For The Republican Party” Days. Unfortunately, you also don’t get paid for these days, and as you are likely unwilling to turn your party toward a new direction, you are unlikely to finish ahead of Donald Trump in any poll.
- Summer “Bernie Sanders” Days. We bet he, like Donald Trump, has controversial stuff to say, that would be entertaining on television… if anyone reported what he has to say… which the networks don’t appear to be doing. So, since nobody is nationally listening, perhaps this is a great day to visit your nearest national park.
Categories: Mildly Bad News