USA Today reports that Apple joins Google, Tesla, Mercedes, and other car makers in testing self-driving cars.

1. If the operating system for the Apple self-driving car crashes, what secret combination of buttons will we have to press to reset the system and wait for the Apple logo, followed by a reboot?  Oh, also, who is driving the car if that happens?
2. Will the Google self-driving car autocomplete your destination, sending you to Appleton, Wisconsin, when you really want to go to Applebee’s? Oh, and also happens if their operating system crashes?
3. Will the Mercedes self-driving car be a convertible that slowly self-drives fifty-year old men through wealthy shopping districts with music blaring? And will the song be “Born in the USA” since that’s where so many Mercedes are made these days, despite the fact that their buyers seem to thing they are German-made.

Categories: Mildly Bad News

Tags: automobiles, Humor, Parody, satire, self-driving cars, technology