Study Shows Abercrombie & Fitch Font Will Solve All Of The Government’s Problems. We Suggest 3 More Things The Government Can Learn From Abercrombie.

CNN reports that a middle school whiz has been able to figure out how to save the U.S. federal and state governments hundreds of millions of dollars: print documents with a font that uses less ink.

And the ink saving font is… Garamond.

And we would show you that font rocking out, but we can’t find it on Mac Pages.

Thankfully, we can tell you, we visited Wikipedia, which assures us that Abercrombie & Fitch uses a variation of this font in its store front logos. So if you know what that looks like you can imagine the font shining through the mall behind a cloud of Fierce cologne.

3 More Ways The Government Could Save Money Imitating Abercrombie & Fitch

1. New male uniforms for all government employees = no shirts, just like A&F models and greeters. This money-saving method would include men at all levels, including the President of the United States. From what we’ve seen, Russia has been testing this cost-saving method with its own leader for years.

2. Reduce lighting in all government offices to match the level of lighting in Abercrombie stores. Because, really, does the government employee who kept you on hold for an hour need to see anything more than an already lit computer screen telling you which other government office you need to phone to solve your problem?

3. Turn up the music in government offices! You know those people ahead of you in line at government offices who ask hundreds of questions, while you wait forever trying to renew some document? Now imagine the music is so loud that they just give up asking questions about what a passport or driver’s license is; or whether they should put their name on the part of the form that says “your name.” Fewer questions means fewer employees necessary to answer pointless questions. Or at a minimum, people will be happier waiting in line while they hear upbeat dance music instead of dumb questions.


Categories: Technology

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1 reply

  1. If they just service attractive people, it would cut down on the lines too.

    Liked by 1 person

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