Not Logging Into Your Google Account? Google Might Just Assume You’re Dead Instead Of Using Yahoo!

CNN reports that Google has created a new service that gives you the option to notify friends or family if your Google accounts remain inactive for three, six, or nine months.

From the article:

“After that time period of inactivity, Google will send out a text message and e-mail the secondary address you provide. If you don’t respond, it will assume … well, the worst.”

3 Worse People That You Could Notify About Your Google Inactivity Than Friends And Family

1. 9-1-1 operators. “That’s great,” you say, “Since I live alone, if I slip in the bathtub, and become immobile, all I have to do is survive on delicious bathtub water and nutritious shampoo aloe for a quarter, until help arrives!” Easy, there, Clumsy-But-Friendly, you really need to pick a new dating web site screen name, because nobody wants someone falling on their coffee on a first date. And you also may want to know you can’t email 9-1-1.

2. Google. We suspect that reminding Google you haven’t used your Google accounts recently will just lead to more emails from Google suggesting people you might know on Google+!

3. People You Might Know On Google+.  Has life really come down to the point where you expect strangers to be alerted that you may have fallen in the bathtub? Perhaps you should make more friends and join a club-of-similarly minded people, like “The-People-Who-Wash-Slippery-Oil-Off-Of-Pelicans-After-Oil-Spills-In-Their-Bathtubs-Club.”

Categories: Humor, Technology, The Future

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

1 reply

  1. I haven’t been on Google+ in months. But I’m not worried that Google+ sends a notification that I’m dead to my Google+ contacts, because they are probably all haven’t been to Google+ in months.


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