Technology Exists To Have Robot Spit In Your Fries Instead Of Unsupervised Teenagers!

CNBC reports that new robots could be trained to replace service industry employees including coffee baristas, hamburger flippers, and retail store T-Shirt folders. But what about the industries that involve providing fewer services, like say, being a member of Congress?

3 Politicians We’d Like To See Robot Versions Of

1. Rand Paul. Forget what you’ve heard about Rand Paul’s filibustering skills. A robot could filibuster for infinity, without a single bathroom break!

2. Marco Rubio. A robot certainly wouldn’t have to awkwardly reach to get a bottle of water during a speech. Unless you consider the part when the robot drinks the water and sparks begin flying out of it to be “awkward.”

3. Michelle Bachmann. We’re certain robotic Michelle Bachmann could have won the race with CNN reporter Dana Bash down the halls of the Capitol Building by at least twenty lengths, when being asked to substantiate incorrect allegations made that the President hires a dog-walker with taxpayers’ money. Of course, robotic Michelle Bachmann wouldn’t make factual errors, and even if it did, it could transform itself into a dog-walker wearing a monocle and top hat, and convince the public the story was true.



Categories: Humor, Technology

Tags: , , , , , , , ,

3 replies

  1. I noticed all your robots are Republicans. Are Democrats too highly evolved to replicate? Or, do they simply not operate from a consistent logic.

    As Winston Churchill once said, “If you are not liberal by the time you are 30, you have no heart. If you are not conservative by the time you are 40, you have no brain.”

    Like

  2. We’ve seen reports before, including the link below from a seemingly relevant source, that Winston Churchill never said anything like that.
    http://www.winstonchurchill.org/learn/myths/myths/quotes-falsely-attributed-to-him

    However, we have addressed your concern in our latest entry! Thanks for your comment which gave us the idea!

    Like

Trackbacks

  1. Because You Demanded It: 3 Democrat Robots We’d Like To See | NotTheWorstNews

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: