CNN reports that cooking food in a microwave is one of “the best ways to retain your food’s vitamins and minerals.”

Who knew?

3 Questions That Arise From This Story

1. “I eat glue, sewing needles, and buttons during my kindergarten art class, does this apply to me?” No, and this is why microwave ovens are decreasingly part of kindergarten classrooms. Thanks for ruining everyone else’s chance at getting Pizza Pop treats at recess, Tyler!

2. “I’m more into drinking blood, being a Cullen family member and all, does this apply to me?” We’re guessing no, but the good news is there’s a kid who eats sewing needles who may be able to give you some nutritious blood, without having to harm somebody.

3. “Never mind vitamins! I’m more curious about maintaining sanity. Is there anyway to stop my microwave from beeping every minute to remind me my baked potato is ready? I’m making a 30 course meal, I’m not going to forget about the baked potato!” We’re sure that whoever manufactured your microwave in China provided clear instructions of how to avoid this predicament.

Categories: Health, Humor

Tags: food, Health, Humor, kindergarten, nutrition, postaday, recipes, technology, Twilight