Ad For Tonight’s Oscars Costs More Than Used Toyota Tercel

CNBC reports that a commercial during tonight’s Academy Awards will cost between $1.65 million and $1.80 million for 30 seconds.

3 Worse Things You Could Waste $1.65 Million On

1. Half a viewing of the movie Gone In 60 SecondsWhy is a movie about something being gone in 60 seconds 118 minutes long? Answer: like anything starring Nicholas Cage: who cares?

2. Any number of DVD episodes of the Family GuySorry Seth McFarlane, we know you dish out the hilarious insults when you host roasts on Comedy Central, but let’s face it, Family Guy is the Simpsons without Springfield, Disco Stu, and original humor. Fortunately, when you host tonight’s Oscars, Meryl Streep and Jack Nicholson jokes are easier to write than a song about the Stonecutters’ Club.

3. Meryl Streep and Jack Nicholson jokes. Hey, someone’s gotta pay something to write these for tonight’s oscars. And as long as they’re jokes about Meryl Streep playing the best Mrs. Doubtfire ever in Julie and Julia, we agree!

P.S. Julie Powell, this blog is approaching your 365-consecutive-day record, and we’re producing all-original-comedic material!

Categories: Humor

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