Yesterday we wrote that Ivanka and Eric Trump failed to register in time to vote in the New York Republican Primary. We have 3 suggestions as to why…

1. They thought they needed the official longer-than-official-long-form Trump-demanded birth certificate along with college transcripts as identification.
2. His other adult son, Donald Trump Jr. registered – because he knew only people named “Donald Trump” are eligible to make America Great again and allowed to choose the next King of Trumpmerica.
3. Too busy not doing anything that would allow them to appear in tabloids. Incidentally, we’re certain they’ve never ended up in tabloids because they are good kids and not because Trump is reportedly friends with the CEO of the National Enquirer.

Categories: Mildly Bad News

Tags: Humor, journalism, media, Parody, Politics, satire