Based on long lines of cars, people in Merrimack think voting is done via drive-thru. “Tell me more about this drive-thru,” we expect Chris Christie to bellow, “If it is full of voters for Trump, shut down the bridge leading… Read More ›
Month: February 2016
About That Tim Cook Super Bowl Tweet
Apple CEO Tim Cook tweeted a photo after the Broncos won the Super Bowl, which some tweeters are calling blurry. You can view the photo here. Since we’re all about helping CEOs, here are: 3 Excuses For Tim Cook’s Blurry… Read More ›
Airlines Offering Free Snacks Again
CNBC reports that American Airlines and United Airlines are bringing back snacks to domestic flights. On United you may get a free snack called a “stroopwafel.” 3 More Dumb Airline Snack Names We’d Like To See Snoop Waft-Yo. These marijuana cookies… Read More ›
Brief Summary Of Tonight’s GOP Debate
Donald Trump still thinks America can win again. Except the Denver Broncos. Hey – he didn’t say all of America can win. Dear Marco Rubio: When Chris Christie is challenging you for not answering questions and just using talking points, three… Read More ›
Now you can stop worrying about getting old!
Quartz reports that a recent British study indicates the happiest age group is “65 to 79.” This age group also reports having the least anxiety. 3 Questions That Arise From This Story Was this a random British sample? It’s about… Read More ›
About Those Hillary Emails Republicans Keep Going On About
The Guardian reports that former GOP Secretaries of State Condoleezza Rice and Colin Powell used private email accounts for classified emails. Newsies out there may recall that when former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton did the same thing, it was… Read More ›
Breaking: Rick Santorum Drops Out Of Presidential Race
Also breaking: did CNN accidentally run a headline from 2012 by reporting this? Hey, CNN, we got more “breaking” 2012 news nobody cared about then – Snookie’s friend Deena hooked up with some loser with a pixelated face on Jersey Shore before the… Read More ›
3 Things We Expect To See In New Hampshire
Ted Cruz combines “TrusTED” campaign with the B-52’s Love Shack to create remix replacing “Tin Roof Rusted” with “Ted Cruz – Trusted!”* 2. Doctor Ben Carson announces he is suspending his Champagne. Because he won’t win a state he… Read More ›
Brief Summary Of Iowa Caucuses
No scarecrows present at caucuses – so the corn is safe, Iowa! For those of you who thought Iowa is boring – CNN presents: people lining up, sitting, and counting. 3. Donald Trump happy no scarecrows showing up after ghostly-scaring… Read More ›
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