Yesterday we wrote about reports that Microsoft CEO, Steve Balmer, says he will retire in 12 months. 3 More Things We Don’t Want To See Happen Related To This Story 1. Prior to retirement, every Windows user gets a free… Read More ›
Business
Guy Who Didn’t Invent iPod, iPhone, iPad, iTunes, Google, and the Apple Store retiring!
The Associated Press reports that Steve Balmer will retire as Microsoft CEO in 12 months. 3 Worse Things That Could Happen 1. New Microsoft CEO = Clippy, the seemingly unemployed talking paper clip that has all the hottest high-tech advice… Read More ›
This May Not Be The Best Time To Try To Sell Those Worthless Internet Dial-Tone-Screeching-Simulating Alarm Clock Stocks You Bought In 1999!
CNBC reports that the NASDAQ stock exchange halted all trading for at least two hours, with all trading to resume at 3:25 EST. Three Other Times In Life You Wish Trading Was Halted 1. When you were a kid and… Read More ›
Bank Approves Credit Card Application Where Applicant Handwrote Awesome Terms On The Application!
MSN reports that a Russian man received a credit card application in the mail, and wrote in his own changes to the terms of the card on the contract. From the article: “The bank approved the contract without reading the amended… Read More ›
Man Goes From Billionaire To Millionaire… And You Were Mad You Lost Your Smart Phone.
Yahoo Finance reports that since April of last year, a Brazilian man has seen his net worth fall from $34.5 billion to $200 million. 3 Worse Things Than Losing Billions Of Dollars 1. $34.3 billion dollars in cars. Just imagine… Read More ›
Aw, Man, Did You Lend Detroit Cab Fare After A Night Out Last Weekend? Bummer.
CNN Money reports that Detroit, Michigan has declared bankruptcy! 3 Assets We Would Like To Buy From Detroit 1. The U.S. side of the Detroit River. We’re only interested in the side of the river drowning in metaphorical red ink,… Read More ›
We Were Told There Would Be French Fries (In Cheese Curds And Gravy) Here.
CNBC reports that the City of Paris has provided workers in the tourist industry with a manual called “Do you speak touriste?” The goal of the manual is to teach workers in the industry how tourists from various countries would… Read More ›
Your Move Starbucks! When Are We Going To Be Able To Get A Venti Coffee In An Ice Cup?
Time reports that Coca-Cola has introduced a new bottle to Colombian consumers made of ice. From the article: “Coke is touting the environmentally friendly nature of these melt-away bottles, but as ABC News points out, they require so much extra refrigeration… Read More ›
Now What Are You Going To Do With The Useless Gold Mine In Your Backyard?
CNBC reports that the price of gold has fallen to a level where it may cost more to remove gold from mines than what it’s worth. 3 Solutions We Propose To This Problem 1. Emergency Olympiad featuring all of the… Read More ›
U.S. Stocks Plunge Because The Economy Is Improving. Obviously!
USA Today reports that U.S. stocks are plunging on fears that the U.S. Federal Reserve will stop buying bonds to help the economy, on the belief that the U.S. economy is improving. Got that? Economy improving = bad! 3 Things… Read More ›