Yahoo Finance reports that Twitter announced today that it’s monthly active users rose from 302 million to 304 million. Who are these new users? Here are three guesses. 1. Writers trying to get Twitter followers by following other writers back…. Read More ›
Parody
3 Less Obvious Reasons We Suspect Some People From Detroit Don’t Like Satan Statue
People reports that a statue of Satan was unveiled at a secret location on Saturday. Obviously some people found this offensive for religious reasons although a director for the organization that organized the statue unveiling said it was non-theistic. Anyway,… Read More ›
People Threaten To Burn Down Satan Statue
The Edmonton Sun reports that a Satanic Sculpture was unveiled in a secret location in Detroit by a group that does not worship satan, but supports separation of Church and State. The location was secret because people threatened to burn… Read More ›
Oops! Fed Reserve Allegedly Accidentally Published Rate Hike Plans Online.
Reuters reports that the U.S. Federal Reserve allegedly accidentally published its plans online to raise interest rates by 0.25% this year. 3 Questions That Arise From This Story 1. Could they publish something that would raise the public’s interest rates… Read More ›
3 Slogans We Propose For Caesars Casinos If They Go Bankrupt
Reuters reports that following an unfavorable judge ruling, Caesars Entertainment Corp may be forced into bankruptcy. Since we are all about helping companies, here are 3 slogans we propose for the company. 1. The House Always Wins: Unless You’re Caesar’s… Read More ›
Of Course Amazon Is Worth More Than Wal-Mart…
Fortune reports that following reporting earnings, in after-hour trading, Amazon is now worth more than Wal-Mart. That’s reportedly about $250 billion to $230 billion. How did this happen? Amazon made a surprise quarterly profit of about $92 MILLION. So, of… Read More ›
Three 50 Cent Lyrics That Contradict His Sworn Testimony That He Rents Bling.
CNBC reports that rapper 50 Cent said under oath that a 65-karat ring he posted on Instagram was leased. He further swore that his fancy cars and jewelry are leased, not owned. Here are 3 Real 50 Cent lyrics we… Read More ›
You Thought That Person On A Phone At A Theater Annoyed You
Yahoo reports that a teen who admits he was drinking recently got on stage at the Broadway play “Hand to God” to try to plug his phone charger into an onstage outlet. 3 Questions That Arise From This Story 1…. Read More ›
San Jose Mecury News Publishes Online Article That Reads Like The Onion
The San Jose Mercury News published an article about a company planned to be spun off by Yahoo named “Aabaco Holdings Inc.” The article was entitled “Yahoo’s Alibaba spinoff has a new name, but it’s already taken.” This might be… Read More ›
We Have 3 Better Names For Tesla’s “Ludicrous Mode”
Zacks reports that Tesla Motors announced today a new version of its model S electric car featuring “Ludicrous mode” which goes zero to 60 in under 3 seconds. Here are 3 names we’d rather see… 1. Ludacris Mode – tells… Read More ›