Grab Your Top Hat And Monocle, Majority Of Congress Now Millionaires.

CNBC reports that according to the Center of Responsive Politics, that for the first time ever, the majority of the members of Congress are millionaires.

Questions That Arise From This Story

1. If people are going to elect millionaires to do nothing, why is A-Rod not in Congress, since an arbitrator just ruled that he is suspended for 162 games? At least if A-Rod was in Congress fewer members would try to get to third base with interns.*

2. “But who is going to fight for the rights of billionaires in Congress?” Good point, campaign donors. Can you really trust a millionaire to look out for your interests? How can a millionaire understand the needs of oil barons when they probably pump self-serve gasoline, instead of having their Cavalier King Charles Spaniel bark proper orders to the robotic butler to fill up the tank?

3. “Is this why there is now a hotel on Baltic Avenue? All I know is that I was passing ‘Go,’ celebrating not landing on the space making me pay income tax, and now I have to pay $450 to stay on this stupid purple space? Why did I ever vote with my dice to avoid raising taxes?”

*Because he would throw them out in a 6-4-3 double play. Did you not check the Wikipedia entry on “Baseball Humor” before coming here?



Categories: Humor, Politics

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6 replies

  1. The question is, how many were millionaires before entering congress? 🙂

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  2. How do they keep getting re-elected? That’s the part that blows my mind.

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  3. Don’t forget that Mr. Peanut (from Planter’s) also wears a top hat and monocle. Perhaps there is also a nut analogy in there somewhere.

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    • There’s no law saying a giant peanut can’t be elected to Congress. And if he was, he could bring down the average income by saying he just makes peanuts.

      We accept no responsibility for the quality of comedy in our responses to messages in the comments section.

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