Category Archives: Etiquette
Your Restaurant May Be Secretly Spying On You… So Think Twice Before Sneaking All The Sweet N’ Low Into Your Purse!
The New York Times reports that restaurants are increasingly keeping records of their patrons’ dining records for use on future visits. One restaurant owner stated:
“And we take note of the people who sat for 6 ½ hours last time, so next time we are sure to give them an uncomfortable seat.”
3 Worse Ways To Get Rid Of Patrons Who Spend 6 and a 1/2 Hours At A Restaurant
1. Seat them on a cramped economy airplane headed from New York to Los Angeles. They will have to disembark the plane when the flight ends in five hours.
p.s. If people are flying from New York to LA faster than you can finish a restaurant meal, please promise the world you will never do anything that requires lengthy decisions, like play a game of Words With Friends. There’s nothing worse than an 80-year game of Words With Friends, where recently slang words like “Cray” will be obsolete in the year 2092.
Dear Patron, please do not spend 6.5 hours at a restaurant called Bacon Nation, signed, your arteries. Yes, this was signed in blood, in case you were wondering.
2. Seat them next to a parent potty training their kid at the restaurant table, just like the woman in Utah we wrote about yesterday. Or better yet, seat them in the potty chairs those kids were using, as those have to be less “comfortable” than wherever that New York restauranteur might seat them.
3. Seat them in desks at the front of the room in front of a chalkboard, and tell them they have to write an exam in a course they forgot to go to all semester. This will have them race out of the restaurant as they think this is a reoccurring nightmare they keep having. Or they will write the exam in the time limit of one hour and know it’s time to leave. It’s a win-win, especially if the exam is your kid’s math homework!
Fewer Jerks Are Even Bothering To Retrieve Their Voicemail Messages!
CNBC, citing USA Today data reports voice mail usage is down. Specifically, Vonage has found that voicemails left have declined 8%, and voicemails retrieved have declined 14%.
Yes, that means the jerks you’re leaving messages for are not bothering to listen to them.
3 Worse Things Than People Not Listening To Your Voicemail
1. Leaving a detailed message, telling your friend everything they need to know about a party tonight, and then they phone back two minutes later, saying, “I see you called, what’s up?” Read the rest of this entry
Flight Crew Fashion Police Spark Debate On What Is Acceptable To Wear On An Airplane
CNBC reports that two passengers who were asked to adjust their clothing on U.S. air carriers told their stories to sympathetic bloggers, leading to a viral debate of proper air travel attire.
Specifically, a woman flying from Las Vegas was told by a Southwest employee to cover up her cleavage, an action we’ve never seen happen in any beer commercial involving flying on airplanes.
Another woman received a “lecture” from an American Airlines Pilot for wearing a T-shirt with a four-lettered word.
3 More T-Shirt Ideas That May Lead To A Lecture From A Flight Crew
1. A T-shirt that says “My parents went to San Diego, and all they brought me back was a lousy T-Shirt, but not this one, because their baggage got lost by this airline on the flight back.” Read the rest of this entry
3 Worse Places You Could Receive A $3 Surcharge For Rudely Talking On Your Phone Than A Vermont Deli
The Consumerist reported yesterday that a Vermont deli imposed a new surcharge for its customers warning in a sign that “$3 will be added to your total if you fail to GET OFF YOUR PHONE while at the counter. IT’S RUDE.“
We at NotTheWorstNews were just as surprised as you were to learn that there’s cell phone coverage in Vermont! Wikipedia’s Vermont entry sums it up best:
Generally, cell phone coverage in the state outside of the major metropolitan areas is weak due to interference from mountains.
We at NotTheWorstNews were just as surprised as you were to learn that there are major metropolitan areas in Vermont! The largest city, Burlington, has about 42,000 people, which means that with an attendance of 44,041, more people attended yesterday’s White Sox-Yankees game at Yankee Stadium than live in Vermont’s largest city. And you can bet if anyone ever tried to tell a New Yorker in the Bronx that they had to pay $3 for talking on the phone while ordering a sandwich, Larry David would have written an episode of Seinfeld about it. Read the rest of this entry
